Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
