The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
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MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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