the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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