I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize