my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Your penis caused this!
Randomize
