You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
i drank out of a bidet.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
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