Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize