After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
