Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
