So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
