Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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