Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
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