Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Gay?
German.
Pity.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Randomize
