ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
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