I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
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