just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
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