i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Randomize
