just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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