1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Good news!! I can adult!! π turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ππ
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