her vagina looked like bernie madoff
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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