Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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