Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Randomize
