So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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