mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I am full of burrito and curiosity
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
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