youre lurking in front of me
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
