It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
