Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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