ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
i dont even know how to be here
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Randomize
