you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
