I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Randomize
