apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
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