What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
We just shotgunned beers for America
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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