with your own penis?
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
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