So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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