we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
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