Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Randomize
