I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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