I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Randomize
