I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Randomize
