hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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