No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
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