you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
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I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
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Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
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