Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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