People in love make me want to vomit
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Randomize
