i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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