being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
