i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
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