break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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