Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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