member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Randomize
