what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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