i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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