he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Randomize
